"Hi, I'm from upstairs, and I was wondering if I could borrow a cup of sugar" "Yeah, sure" "That's a warning WOOO! WOOO!" - FHM Warning advert. Funny? Well I liked it.

page170 PRESENTS: THE SPECCY GAMES THAT ARE BEGGING THEIR MOTHERS TO BE REMADE

I know. Remakes are awful. They all are. Centipede will be awful. Frogger was awful. Pitfall was crap. But then, they can be great peices of lovelyness, like Metal Gear Solid (which nearly lost the plot). Here I present the ones that need to be re-done. You disagree? You're bad man!

Let's start at the top, this game was Mr Stu Campbell's No1 speccy game of all time. 'Tis is:

3D Deathchase....

So we have Road Rash, and we have GTA. But 3D deathchase simply needs to be loved up once more. Why, I hear you shout from the tops of trees and nearly deafen me. I TOLD YOU TO FUCKING SHUT IT! GET OFF MY ESTATE! Ahem.

But to the point. We are at a point at time where Deathchase is heavily original. Oh yes. Ok so all you do is dodge trees and kill ppl on motorbikes, but look at Metal Gear Solid. If they can maim an old game to create a better one, why can't this be done on Deathchase?

Firstly, you take the woodland. Make this the first 3 levels of the game. After this, move it on to a Park, similar to Die Hard 3's Central Park. Have fun accidently running over pedestrian's ("I don't think that's necceray now" - Ed) ("Oooh, I hope your female, because I'm loving you all up!" - God) and other various innocent things. Then you can add missions, pick up things, kill certan evil ppl (They have to be evil, we don't wish to risk a media backlash). What we are looking at is a cross between GTA and RoadRash 3D, but better. And oh yeah, add some extra weapons, Missiles and things, and shoot the fuckers down! Ahem.....

Perspective New Name: Deathchase 2000
Developer: Bullfrog or DMA

THE DIZZY GAMES:

Remember that ickle cute egg? You don't? Your mummy will deal with you. But seriously, if you can't remember being fond of the egg, you didn't own a Spectrum. Dizzy was the Speccy's Sonic/Mario. It was an unoffical mascot, and like most computer gamery mascots, you either loved it or hated it. But the actual games were excellent. In my opinion, anyway.

The Dizzy games were sort of Platforms Adventure's, you picked things up, put them down, spoke to all sorts, had an, what appeared to be, incestous family. The nearest 3D equivilant to it now would be Lara Croft's Tomb Raider series.

So with TR around now, would a Dizzy remake be viable. Yes. To experience Dizzy again would be, for me, well, erm, quite fun. Those dodgy scripts, those dodgy pick-ups, that crap loader screen, erm... Maybe I'm going on the wrong tack here....

Imagine Dizzy in his own 100% 3D world, imagine actully being able to acidently smash his egg. Imagine the face of dizzy when he looks confused. Oh Dizzy, come to me. Come to me. COME TO ME.

What?

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