O.J.'s Bronco

 

 

Special News Release

Ford Motor Company - Detroit, Michigan

As of Friday, June 24, 1994, the 1994 Ford Bronco has been officially

selected as the vehicle of choice for all felons in the United States.

The conclusive California road test, as seen on national TV, proved without

a doubt that the 1994 Bronco can successfully hold off 15 or more police cars,

3 police helicopters and the entire population of the United States for more

than an hour and a half, while never exceeding 43 miles per hour. This

vehicle even works as well while parked in the driveway of your residence.

 

If you are a felon, then we have a special deal for you on a brand new 1994

Ford Bronco. Just go to your local Ford dealer and ask for the new O.J.

package. This specially equipped Bronco comes with a .30 caliber pistol,

twenty five rounds of ammunition, blood resistant upholstery, cellular phone

with speed dialing for 911 calls, a former famous football player blow-up

doll, and a high powered, well qualified lawyer who will greet you when you

arrive home.

Picture yourself leaning comfortably back in your seat listening to the

gentile swirl of the hilicopter blades and police cars purring. And, if you

act now we will throw in the O.J. magical disappearing ginzo knife at no

extra charge. Be the first one in your town to own the 1994 edition of the

Ford O.J. Bronco.

See your local dealer now!!!!